I think the biggest thing that shocked me when Andi fell on his nose was that I wasn’t shocked. I don’t know if it’s being part of knowing and loving Andi for so long or just a reassuring understanding that whatever mess he gets himself into its going to be just fine and there’s no point in worrying about him, he certainly wouldn’t want that. After I heard Andi’s first claims of breaking his nose I think I only realised something was actually wrong when I saw Matilde put her hands to her face and gasp. I hadn’t seen what had happened, I didn’t even know it was Tom he was giving a piggy back to. All I knew at that point was I had to switch on to responsible wife mode. Luckily Albin jumped to the rescue and had beaten me at reacting quickly to become helpful man at the scene. Before we knew it Albin had taken the towel out of his bag and pressed it against Andi’s face, then he was running up the hill in flip flops to find a taxi to take us to the hospital. Matilde and I carry-walked Andi up the hill to find Albin in the doorway of a bar where a barmaid was on the phone to a taxi. We then got handed some ice to put in the towel and then the taxi arrived to take us to A and E. All before you could say Buffalo.
Well that evening escalated and ended quickly I thought. My next thought was then, oh god we’re going to spend hours waiting to be seen by a doctor. Then Andi’s drunken rantings began. To be fair he seemed quite upbeat about it all, the taxi driver didn’t seem too scared to have someone potentially bleeding all over the car and Andi was doing well to respond to questions of ‘how did you get yourself in to that state?’ With something as shocking as that happening you tend to sober up quite quickly, apart from Andi that is. Once inside the hospital and after I’d registered Andi chatting to the receptionist about us being from the UK, not having a registered doctor or a permanent address, I then turned to see Andi sat in the waiting area just looking like he was about to cause trouble.
There were only three other people waiting yet I think we managed to piss them all off. It wasn’t obvious ‘what they were in for’ but nobody goes to A and E without reason so let’s assume they were all in pain or discomfort and wouldn’t want to spend any amount of time with a drunk and bleeding Andrew Wills. When Andi realised he would have to wait he then got agitated and tried to make me believe he was fine, his nose was no longer broken and we should just leave for the wound to heal on its own. He wouldn’t sit still, he wouldn’t keep the ice on and he complained he wanted water which he wasn’t allowed until a nurse had seen him. I was given an ice pack from the receptionist yet that annoyed Andi even more as it wouldn’t sit right on the wound. I then managed to throw ice across the waiting area towards the other patients whilst attempting to rewrap the towel and get Andi to hold it against his face. The only way I could get Andi to stay and wait was to bring up the possibility that it could go against our travel insurance by not seeking medical attention. Thankfully a nurse called us in not long after, when Andi went to sit down I had to whisper to her that he’d been drinking as a way to apologise for his behaviour and also to get her to check anything he said with me, just in case he started to lie just to be let go. The nurse had a look and thought it wasn’t broken but said a doctor would need to confirm that, she put a dressing on the wound and sent us back out to the waiting room. He was then allowed water. He was given a tiny plastic cup and told to refill from the bathroom. Andi drinks gallons of water so the tiny cup would never suffice. I settled down to wait and he went to the bathroom. It was only when I got through two advert breaks of One Born Every Minute which was being shown on the waiting room tv that I thought I best go look for him, then he came back. With the maternity ward next door I thought how weird that this is what they play on the telly, maybe it helps the people waiting get their mind off their injuries. It was only later in to our trip that I discovered NZ tv actually shows a lot of UK tv programmes, up until then I actually thought the hospital just played One Born Every Minute to the A and E waiting room!
An hour went by of Andi telling bad nose breaking jokes, the only one I can think of now is that he kept saying girls dig scars but that he was also glad he got married before he broke his nose! With all the laughing about it though Andi didn’t want the truth to be told about his stupidity to my cousin who we were to visit the day after next. Andi would rather people think it was a sporting injury.
The Dr called us in and he seemed the kind of guy who already knew Andi’s story by just looking at him and wasn’t surprised or shocked by the stupidity. The Dr said it wasn’t broken, Andi had just split the skin and the best way for it to heal was naturally. So he washed the wound, put a new plaster on and told us to come back in a few days to check it wasn’t infected. We then waited an age to get a cab back to the hostel. Knowing we didn’t have anything to do the next day but suffer a hangover and we wanted to let Albin and everyone know that Andi was alright, we headed back to the bar. What followed was a couple of hours of story telling, you just had to look at Andi and his bandaged face to want to know what happened, he was also getting drunker by the minute. This was down to the fact the Dr had given him a prescription for antibiotics which meant no drinking for a week, after that night anyway. Andi has no recollection of the bar, there has even been photos appear on Facebook of people posing with Andi and his bandaged nose that Andi doesn’t remember.
I finally managed to drag Andi to bed after he started buying rounds of bottles of beer and forgetting who they were for, we weren’t the last ones in the bar though. A select few of the Kiwi Ex were still drinking even though they had to start an eight hour hike in just a few short hours. The only reason we got up the next day was to go on a jet boat to the huka falls. We’d pre booked on our way in to Taupo the day before. Now Andi had a face like prize fighter and a hangover. Topped off with the journey to the boat in an non air conditioned old minibus and a jet boat ride was not going to be as enjoyable as first thought. We were chosen to sit at the front of the boat which meant we had to hold on even tighter. The trip involved being driven at speed round a lake with the boat closely bordering the reeds that lined the edge of the lake and once in a while erratically steering left, right, left and then a 360 degree spin. Each spin was taken at such speed I came out of my seat. There were no seat belts, we just had a hand rail in front of us to hold on to with Andi sat on my right crossed over his hand to keep me from jumping up altogether. After I got used to the speed and effects of turning plus knowing we weren’t going to get massively wet I began to enjoy myself. Little did I know Andi was feeling more worse for ware the faster we went. With a hot return journey back on the minibus to our hostel Andi decided he was going back to bed. I took the opportunity to wander around town, visit a beauty salon and learn of some potential restaurants for dinner. After a day napping Andi felt good enough to go outside and we went for a steak dinner. We attempted a three course meal but this being our first restaurant outing since I can’t remember when, we seemed to have reduced our appetites. The food was delicious even though we had to force ourselves to consume a decent enough amount without it looking like we were rude to the chefs. Luckily it was only a 1 min walk back to the hostel to collapse with proudly achieved indigestion.